[updated Oct. 2, 2014]
In the USA, we have not lost the pioneering spirit of innovation. I'd like a fast forward button, please.
So many of us live below the poverty lines. People are in poverty with full time jobs in dual worker families! We are underpaid, or under employed, certainly my loved ones are overworked. I feel like it's direct effect of one of the most seriously toxic political periods in our American History. Money talks, and small people balk. 2008 was the explosion, but the volcano has been boiling for the last 30 years. And I am ALL about free enterprise. I am not about criminal behaviors without consequences.
Personally, I am living through triple ripple effects from illness, life changes, an unrecovered economy, and other circumstances. I am wiped down to nothing for several reasons. Most of which, I had no control over. I have to fix this, yet am not sure how. I have to be brutally honest, challenge my worst fear of losing this house when I am told to GO. I've lived through the things I thought were the lowest or worst/scariest thing that I wouldn't survive. I survived. I'm not sure how to solve leaving a house that I've lived in for the longest period of my life without a job, or savings. Yet I have something that's worth being paid for - all this experience has to count!
We are not just what our education, degree, or career path WAS. I have been out of the W-2 work force since 2002. Since then I have become even more multifaceted from many experiences. That has value.
I never wanted to become so ill that I could not hold a job. Now, I have to find work with a body that does not hold up any longer. I have no choice. Reinvent. Innovate. Because - he's gone. So having a job means I have a shot at becoming at least part way back to being as self sufficient as I was before I got married. Aside from the emotional toll, his leaving took my hard earned half of our financial life partnership of all property and savings. I believe I worked harder than any paid job since I've been out of the work world. And I loved doing so.
Sink or swim time. I could become homeless and I find it unacceptable. I am hitting my mid 50's. Because I already have small SSDI from Crohn's, tons of surgeries, and other auto immune illnesses. I am grateful to have some social services. These are not "entitlements". Food stamps, and Medicaid is a blessing right now.
In the USA, we have not lost the pioneering spirit of innovation. I'd like a fast forward button, please.
So many of us live below the poverty lines. People are in poverty with full time jobs in dual worker families! We are underpaid, or under employed, certainly my loved ones are overworked. I feel like it's direct effect of one of the most seriously toxic political periods in our American History. Money talks, and small people balk. 2008 was the explosion, but the volcano has been boiling for the last 30 years. And I am ALL about free enterprise. I am not about criminal behaviors without consequences.
Personally, I am living through triple ripple effects from illness, life changes, an unrecovered economy, and other circumstances. I am wiped down to nothing for several reasons. Most of which, I had no control over. I have to fix this, yet am not sure how. I have to be brutally honest, challenge my worst fear of losing this house when I am told to GO. I've lived through the things I thought were the lowest or worst/scariest thing that I wouldn't survive. I survived. I'm not sure how to solve leaving a house that I've lived in for the longest period of my life without a job, or savings. Yet I have something that's worth being paid for - all this experience has to count!
We are not just what our education, degree, or career path WAS. I have been out of the W-2 work force since 2002. Since then I have become even more multifaceted from many experiences. That has value.
I never wanted to become so ill that I could not hold a job. Now, I have to find work with a body that does not hold up any longer. I have no choice. Reinvent. Innovate. Because - he's gone. So having a job means I have a shot at becoming at least part way back to being as self sufficient as I was before I got married. Aside from the emotional toll, his leaving took my hard earned half of our financial life partnership of all property and savings. I believe I worked harder than any paid job since I've been out of the work world. And I loved doing so.
Sink or swim time. I could become homeless and I find it unacceptable. I am hitting my mid 50's. Because I already have small SSDI from Crohn's, tons of surgeries, and other auto immune illnesses. I am grateful to have some social services. These are not "entitlements". Food stamps, and Medicaid is a blessing right now.
I MUST do what feels impossible and make it possible. Having a job/work is more than money. I miss being around people, having a purpose each day, being needed, accomplishing tasks each day - pressure of deadlines - but especially learning new things from with others every single day. Being exhausted from a job well done instead of codependent crisis and fear.
I have a life long habit of beating the odds, learning to manage illness that is unmanageable - being a wife, mother, and living a whole life for a few decades. It adds up to CAN DO. I have to shake off rust and re-enter a changed work culture no matter if it's within the life long passion of my former radio announcing career or, more likely, skill sets I learned living 5 decades of life. I've run a household as a home maker. I am privileged to be a mom. I've been a good wife, friend, and more. I can do book keeping, have started and run small businesses, non-profits, served organizational boards, and remain into patient advocacy.
Experience.
Mistakes, triumphs, and all - I am still alive, that means there's a lesson, a purpose in all this. I have a ton of emotional housecleaning to do within my soul, but I want to convey that I have hope. Confidence will follow.
Each thing I must try will bring me refreshed or brand new learning. I am going for hit and miss for now. OPEN SOUL
I have a life long habit of beating the odds, learning to manage illness that is unmanageable - being a wife, mother, and living a whole life for a few decades. It adds up to CAN DO. I have to shake off rust and re-enter a changed work culture no matter if it's within the life long passion of my former radio announcing career or, more likely, skill sets I learned living 5 decades of life. I've run a household as a home maker. I am privileged to be a mom. I've been a good wife, friend, and more. I can do book keeping, have started and run small businesses, non-profits, served organizational boards, and remain into patient advocacy.
Experience.
Mistakes, triumphs, and all - I am still alive, that means there's a lesson, a purpose in all this. I have a ton of emotional housecleaning to do within my soul, but I want to convey that I have hope. Confidence will follow.
Each thing I must try will bring me refreshed or brand new learning. I am going for hit and miss for now. OPEN SOUL
If I fail, at least I tried. My new American Dream is based upon personal responsibility and creativity. It's the trying. Interacting with people, being present, being willing to push back all fears. So much has changed for so many - so, if anything I write resonates with you - my prayers are with you.
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